sex talk

Ever since I had my baby I haven't felt "in the mood" if you know what I mean. I think this is really bugging my bf now, he thinks I don't find him attractive or love him anymore. I keep telling him that's not it, its not him, but he doesn't understand. I try to show him I care in other ways, cuddleling, hugging him, telling him I love him, I even offer to give him a foot rub here and there. Sex shouldn't be the main thing all the time. He should be more understanding of the situation and patient! I can't do much about it though, I can't force myself to do something I just dont feel like doing. When I do get some free time I rather just sleep or relax. Sex is the last thing on my mind right now. *sigh*

As if this wasn't crappy enough, I got a call from my ob/gyn, he confirmed I have gallbladder stones and referred me to a surgeon... wtf?? am I gonna need surgery to remove them???? :/ I don't want any more surgeries especially this soon!!! a c-section was horrific enough. I have the appt. with this new doctor on Thursday... we'll see what the verdict is :/

I'm still at 121. This is very discouraging. I haven't been doing my diet for a couple of days now and to top it all off, my 7 day free trial at the gym expired yesterday :/ I want to enroll at the gym, thank god its not THAT expensive this time, $35/mo + $25 enrollment fee (which I think is bullshit), but I don't have money right now 'til next week. I guess I'll just have to find other ways to exercise for now.