bad habbits

..... smoking cigarettes.. i never thought i'd actually start doing that, ever. Now I smoke every fucking day.. maybe just 1 or 2 but its still bad. I don't want to smoke but Im not sure if I want/can quit at this point...

My mom also says I'm losing too much weight and she's concerned.. I just block it out.. I laugh and tell her that she's overreacting, but is she really?.. I'm down to 119, that's like 6 lbs less than what I had been in the last couple of months.

I dont know if I should worry.. I mean.. last Monday I was 121 and 3 days later it says im 119. Just the fact that I weight myself pretty often is making me think if its okay. I haven't even felt hungry the last few days. Im not sure if its that Im worried about stuff or that I'm soooo set and determined to be at my 'ideal' weight of 110, that my instict is to not feel hungry... I really don't know anymore.

I took this lil test online here and eventhough I know its not a reliable source, my score was 54%, which according to this means: 45-55% There is significant evidence that you may be developing or in the midst of an eating disorder. Whether or not symptoms are present, you appear to be at high risk for becoming symptomatic. Medical evaluation and/or counselling is highly recommended.

go figure.