No, YOU close your motherfucking eyes!! LOL!

-Eh, wha... eh, wha... I'm gonna tell you its just like this.
-Ima tell you, just like this.
-I might... I'm drunk, yeah I been drinking.
-But I wasn't driving.
-The motherfucking officer, he saw a motherfucking
-Jump in my lap, and I told her to get off
-And she got off, and he stopped me
-From driving the car, eh, I don't wanna hear that shit.
-I dont, I dont even wanna hear it, eh
-Whatever you have to do, you do the motherfucking shit
-The motherfucking, eh!
-She must be, she must be giving him some pussy or something.
_________________________________________________________

Cop: "tilt your head back and close your eyes.
Guy: You close your eyes?
Cop: Sir, I'm not doing the test.
No, you close your motherfucking eyes.
Cop: Sir!
Guy: Huh?
Cop: Tilt your head back and close your eyes.
Guy: If you can't close your eyes, why I got to close my motherfucking eyes?
Cop: Because you are the one that's taking the test.
Guy: Uh?
Cop: Tilt your head back and close your eyes.
Guy: Did you tip your head back and close your eyes?
Cop: Sir!, Tilt your head back and close your eyes.
Guy: Is you drunk?

This shit's hilarious!! LOL!